At an annual Youth outing in Island Park, Idaho, I gave a group of young men and women paper, crayons, markers, and colored pencils, then asked them to draw a picture of someone they didn’t like—someone they were currently angry or upset with.I walked around and listened to some of the comments as the teenagers drew their pictures. Some of them were drawn with horns, extra large mouths, crossed eyes. It was quite comical. When all of them were done with their pictures, I had them label the picture with a name and briefly describe why they were upset with this person.
I then took the kids outside to a board that had a target posted on it. I announced: “You now have the opportunity to post your person the board and throw three darts at him or her!”
The kids began to form a line with their drawings. The first one stepped up, posted his picture on the bull’s eye, stepped back a few paces, and threw his first dart. “Right between the eyes!” he said, and did a little victory dance. That was all it took for the rest of the youth get excited and start cheering. He threw his other two darts with equal force and, feeling satisfied, took his seat so the next one could take her turn.
It wasn’t long before the line started clamoring, and you could hear various comments of satisfaction and encouragement. “NICE ONE! Right in the face!” “Good aim!” “Way to go!” They even took to clapping each other on the back, giving high-fives, and doing little victory dances. A few even asked if they could get back in line again.
After the last person took his turn, I gathered the youth and had them seated on the benches around the bonfire I had built as they were doing their activity.
I asked how the activity made them feel. For the most part, they said it made them feel good. I asked them why.
The responses included statements like thes: “It was nice to get out the frustration I was having with this person without doing it in a way that would really hurt them.” “This person makes me feel so bad and stupid all the time. I wanted her to know how she makes me feel.” “I’ve been wanting to get back at this person for a LONG time, and now I feel like I did.” One said, “I just like throwing darts!”
All the responses weren't that positive, though. Some said things like this: “I kinda felt bad afterwards; as a matter of fact, it made me feel worse than I did when she embarrassed me and laughed at me in front of everyone at school.”
And one said, “It just made me mad all over again. I thought I was over it, but now I feel like I just sort of reopened a wound—kind of like I’m reliving it all over again.”
Some of the teens were “too cool” to actually participate in the drawing and dart-throwing. But when it came to cheering and celebration, they participated. They felt the other part of the activity was beneath them. There were even a few who only participated because mostly everyone else did. They didn’t want to feel left out, so they went along with the crowd.
I broke out a set of Scriptures and asked one of the youth to read Matthew 25:40: “And the King shall answer and say unto them, Verily I say unto you, Inasmuch as ye have done it unto one of the least of these my brethren, ye have done it unto me.”
I received looks of confusion, surprise, and embarrassment. I asked one of the youth that got the most joy out of throwing his darts to walk over to the board, remove everyone’s portraits, and pass them back out to those who had drawn them. I then asked him to remove the bull’s eye off the board. As he took it down there were several audible gasps and groans. Behind the actual target was a painting of Christ, our Savior. The painting had holes, scratches, and several small tears in it from the force of the darts that had been thrown.
Comments like these followed: “THAT IS SO MEAN!” “I can’t believe we all fell for it—and were so happy to do it!” “Sister Dudley, that’s just cold.” “I never realized how it hurts the Lord when we hurt others.”
We talked about how they felt as they were cheering each other on and doing their happy dances. We talked about those who just went along with the crowd. We talked about those who had remorse in their vengeance. We talked about those who participated indirectly. We talked about what they feeling after seeing the marks they had made on the portrait of the Savior.
There are times in our lives when we will be hurt, angered, embarrassed, and frustrated by others. It is our ability to forgive and move forward without thought of vengeance or wrong-doing that makes us Christians.
We often think of the above scripture in terms of doing great service for others. My grandma often said, “The only hands the Lord has are yours, and what are you doing with them?” I know I rarely think of being a tool in the hands of the Lord when I’m backsliding or doing those things I ought not to do. We hear it mostly when referring to acts of service and kindness.
If indeed we consider each day our hands to be the very same as those of our Father in Heaven, would we have a softer touch? Would our hands be used to build up or tear down? Would it change how we think on a daily basis? Would our intentions guide our methods, or would our methods guide our intentions?
I testify that Jesus Christ has taken upon Himself every hurt, harm, and misery anyone would ever suffer. And in doing, He has created a way for us to find forgiveness, heal old and new wounds, and have peace. It is my hope that we will always “seek ye first the kingdom” when it is hardest for us to do so.
—Karyn Dudley